Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize