she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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