I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
