Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
