Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
