I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
