Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
