And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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