you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
