Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
