I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
