Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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