How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
