I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
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