STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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