Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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