It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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