Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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