You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
