bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
