I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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