This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
