He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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