I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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