You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
