I'm really into asian looking animals
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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