Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Randomize
