He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
