Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
