haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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