i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
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