how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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