How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Randomize