That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
We are two peas in an std pod
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
