You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
