i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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