good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
