somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
