Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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