fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
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