Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
