hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
