you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
