You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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