you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
