Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
