At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
