How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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