At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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