their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
